“Somehow we have come to believe that good leadership requires a safe distance from those we are called to lead. Medicine, psychiatry, and social work all offer us as models in which ‘service’ takes place in a one-way direction. Someone serves, someone else is being served, and be sure not to mix up the roles! But how can we lay down our life for those with whom we are not ever allowed to enter into a deep personal relationship? Laying down your life means making your own faith and doubt, hope and despair, joy and sadness, courage and fear available to others as ways of getting in touch with the Lord of life” (Nouwen 61).
Nouwen brings up an interesting point here by discussing the seemingly contradictory nature of church leadership and the more worldly conception of leaders as givers, not receivers. If we are not whole members of our community, able to share, learn, and be edified by our fellow believers, then the whole body suffers. However, being a full part of a community does not justify leaders bringing their failings into the forefront of the ministry that they lead. Where do we draw the line between our needs and our leadership? How do we receive Godly boundaries without allowing ourselves to being exposed or becoming prey to isolation? There is nothing “safe” about distance between a leader and the people they lead, but there is also nothing simple about leading others as the broken and needy people that we are. It is easy to regulate your ministry by earthly standards of leadership, and I know that this is something I sometimes transgress on both extremes.
I loved this part in the book too. Nouwen really challenges us to confess our brokenness, and I sincerely believe that this concept is revolutionary. There is a time and a place to speak but it is so encouraging to hear a priest discuss how he's messed up. I love how he suggests that people in ministry should always have a strong support of people praying for them. It's so easy to think that pastors and other authorities have it all together and then we fall under condemnation because we can't measure up to this false standard of perfection. But the truth is: no one is perfect, except the Lord, and we are all constantly being molded into His image. Vulnerability is a huge struggle for me, but the Lord has been helping me be okay with my imperfections. There's a song, I think it's by Mercy Me, and it has the lyrics: "It's not about what you did, but what's been done for you." The Lord used this song to reveal that when I fail to confess sins that I have committed in the past, it's usually because of pride and/or the fact that I am still living under condemnation. But it's not about me. It's about what He did, getting me out of them. I like that He's encouraging me to be more vulnerable and this is my prayer for all of us. :)
ReplyDeleteJessica - great questions, now lets hear your stab at the answers? Good place to start: Jesus. Did He have boundaries? Did He act/share differently in different circles?
ReplyDeleteI would say that Jesus definitely had boundaries; the fact that he had twelve disciples that he poured into was not just a strategy for spreading the Word, but also a model for ministry. He was vulnerable and straight-forward with this circle of men in a way that he never tried to be with his other followers, or the hordes of people he encountered along the way.
ReplyDeleteEven within the disciples, Jesus revealed himself in different ways to a smaller group. At the Transfiguration, Peter, James and his brother John, are the only witnesses. Jesus specifically chose to bring them there, not because they were simply available, but because he understood the value of not revealing everything that he chose to share with everyone in his ministry.
By the same token, there were times when Jesus did not invite any of his disciples into prayer with him. In one instance, he separates himself from the others to pray and decide who will be part of the twelve. At another point, Mark mentions that Jesus gets up very early in the morning to spend time by himself with God. In these circumstances Jesus deems it inappropriate for the disciples to accompany him, so he secludes himself in order to gather strength, wisdom, and direction through reflection and prayer. Through these instances in scripture, we can see that there are distinctive boundaries that Jesus sets up for his own purposes. However, I think it is safe to identify his understanding of leadership and community as one of the reasons behind his actions.
I really liked this post, Jessica, because I think it's one of the primary struggles we encounter in our DTs. What I love about Jesus (among other things) is that, within the boundaries he set for himself (i.e. his closest friends) he poured himself out extravagantly. I love this juxtaposition. Having boundaries did not keep Jesus from laying down his life, giving all of himself, and loving without fear and restraint. I think this is one of the things we really need to understand - that these things are not mutually exclusive. He perfectly demonstrated what it meant to live with both passion and wisdom, not one at the expense of the other.
ReplyDeleteLa la la.
Just to throw this into the mix; I think that there are circumstances when being vulnerable with your shortcomings and failures actually helps people see your God-given wisdom, etc. all the better. What comes to mind is this: you have two men both speaking against alcoholism. One has been a preacher and sober for his entire life, and the other lost his family and life to alcoholism before finally breaking free from it. I think that most people would be more moved and compelled by the second man's account.
ReplyDeleteIt seems that in this way, there is a level to which vulnerability with personal struggles and failings is not just beneficial to the minister, but beneficial to all; you need Christians who say from positions of leadership "Hey, I've done this, and it was terrible...don't do this!", rather than Christians who merely say "the Bible says this is a bad idea!" The question that Nouwen presents is still valid though; where is the line between vulnerability in a leader that is edifying to those being led, and harmful to those being led? I think his answer, to give those moments to the Mind of Christ via submerging in Truth and allowing Him to lead you, is the only way to not mislead through vulnerability.